Lewis & Clark College

The Pioneer Log: Lewis & Clark College's Student-Run Newspaper

Volume 74, Number 15

Lewis & Clark College Student Newspaper

Pioneer Log Staff

2010-02-01

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Lewis & Clark College: Pioneer Log / Mossy Log

Volume 74, Number 15 Friday, February 12, 2010 Duck, Cover and Hold Me
T
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s
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e
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k
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n
Opinion:
l l l l l l l l The
Features:
Arts:
Sports:pg. 9PioLogpg. 10Softballin’
Callahan on Ellison pg. 7Dance, Dance pg. 3
Do you need food stamps?
Emergency drill reveals few flaws in system
PHOTO BY HANNAH PRINCEby Nichole Carnell
Students duck and cover during the
earthquake drill Wednesday after -
noon.Faculty respond to poster incident
PHOTO BY HANNAH PRINCE
Staff and students evacuate to the Fir Acres parking lot.
Continued on pg. 2, POSTERS
Lewis & Clark students, faculty and staff
on all three campuses were asked to put their
day on hold for an all-campus earthquake
and evacuation drill Wednesday afternoon.
The community first spent approximate -
ly five minutes bracing for an earthquake
underneath anything sturdy, then a wet 15
minutes outside until various campus repre -
sentatives sent the all clear to Campus Safety
Director Tim O’Dwyer.
The drill, held as part of a federal man -
date, included practices for both earthquake
preparedness and evacuation procedure.
All buildings were evacuated under the
direction of 100 emergency team leaders,
“mostly staff with a small sprinkling of facul -
ty,” said O’Dwyer. The team leaders donned
bright orange and yellow vests, and were in -
structed to relay the all clear to building co -
ordinators and then on to nine area super -
visors. The area supervisors, sporting green
vests, then reported directly to O’Dwyer via
walkie-talkies.
“I think it went really well, especially in
comparison to last year’s drill,” said Associ -
ate Director of Health Promotions Melissa
Osmond. “The communication was better. I
had a couple of glitches with my radio,” she
said. “The battery died as soon as I turned
it on but we had backup methods of com -
munication.”
Preparing was a “very time-consuming
process,” said O’Dwyer. “In a true emergen -
cy I hope that all of these people would step
up to help the College.”
Though forewarned, students lacked di -
rection on the main campus and many of
them wandered aimlessly. “I have no idea
where I am supposed to be right now,” said
Eli Fabens (’11). “In a real earthquake, I’d be
dead right now.”
Eventually, people made their way to sev -
eral designated areas around campus, while
the community waited for the all clear.
“I’m still unsure whether this is a fire drill or earthquake or both,” said Nico Wrenn
(’10) as he waited in the Fir Acres parking
lot.
Last year the College tested its emergency
system in a lock-down drill in light of the
Virginia Tech shootings. “We are going to be
doing some version of this on a yearly basis,”
O’Dwyer said.
Announcements of the drill were sent
through the College’s emergency notification
system via text messages, phone calls and e-
mails, instructing the LC community to pre -
pare for an earthquake drill, then fire alarms
were pulled for the evacuation drill. The Col -
lege was forewarned about the drill in a cam -
pus-wide e-mail about the procedure, sent
Monday, and by signs placed around campus
on Wednesday.
O’Dwyer encourages people to register
their telephone numbers with the College’s
emergency system, which as of now includes
less than 20 percent of the LC community.
“The first inkling will be through the emer -
gency system,” O’Dwyer said. “If people are
not signed up, in a time of emergency they
will not be able to get any information.”by Angela Webber
Campus to offer interfaith housing
by Stephen Maxwell
ILLUSTRATION BY ALINA LARSONThe poster incident earlier this month
sparked varied discussion and some oppos -
ing responses among Lewis & Clark faculty
members over the past two weeks. The stu -
dent responsible clarified his intentions to
the Pioneer Log last week and came forward
to Dean of Students and Chief Diversity Of -
fice Celestino Limas. But before Limas sent
an email on Feb. 8 saying that he knew the
student’s identity, LC’s faculty debated ap -
propriate reactions to such events over the
faculty e-mail list.
Dean of the Chapel Mark Duntley cre -
ated a petition to be signed by CAS faculty
and staff in response to the incident. The pe -
tition, titled “United Against Hate & Bias
Speech,” was endorsed with the names of
152 faculty and staff members and printed
in last week’s PioLog.
Visiting Assistant Professor of History
Reiko Hillyer sent a message to her col -
leagues in response to Duntley’s petition.
Hillyer said she “felt strongly that people
were rushing to judgment.” She expressed
her concern that professors were being asked
to sign a petition condemning posters that
they had not seen and which they did not
know the context of. “When it comes to
political speech, especially regarding race,
context and intent matter tremendously,”
said Hillyer, who teaches classes on African-American history (and is one of only two LC
faculty members to do so).
A back-and-forth on the faculty e-mail
list followed, including at least seven differ -
ent e-mails addressing the issue. The e-mails
included several professors calling for a more
substantive response than a petition. Visiting
Assistant Professor of Philosophy Edward
Cushman was inspired by one of the messag -
es to do something substantive, and held dis -
cussions about the concept of “hate speech”
in his ethics and logic classes. “I don’t know
that much about the incident,” Cushman
said, “but it was abundantly clear that stu -
dents were deeply effected by it.” Cushman
said that after the discussion, his students
“developed a more refined sense of factors
that make speech offensive and hurtful.”
Duntley did not debate those who op -
posed his petition. “I don’t think any of us
were really right or wrong,” he said. He ap -
preciates the support that was given to the
petition and found it to be a success. “There
were people on campus who were disturbed
by the posters who felt very supported by the
petition,” he said. “This wasn’t intended to
be divisive in any way.”
Duntley said that he wanted to do some -
thing when he saw that students and staff of
color were affected by the “African Warrior”
poster incident. “They felt it was offensive
and frightening,” said Duntley. The petition
Continued on pg. 2, FAITHCampus Living, the Dean of Students’
office and the Chapel offices are working
together to bring an Interfaith Communi -
ty (IFC) housing option to Lewis & Clark
next fall. It will be structured after existing
themed floors, and is intended to include
students from a variety of religious and cul -
tural backgrounds.  According to Dean of
the Chapel Mark Duntley, the main goals of
the community will be to encourage discus -
sion between the various faiths at LC and to
highlight the existence of spiritual groups on
campus.  “We want people to be committed
to learning about others, to living in a com -
munity with other people that are dif -
ferent than they are, but also to be
actually interested
in their own
sort of faith or cultural background,” said Duntley.
This plan was partly inspired by a lack of
visibility for religion and religious groups on
campus. “We do actually have here people
from different traditions and faith,” Duntley
said. “This is a way of getting on the map.” 
It also becomes one more thing the College
can provide to help attract a variety of poten -
tially interested students.  “If you’re trying to
recruit students here who have faith back -
grounds and are interested in this kind of
thing, what do you say is available to them?”
According to the project’s listing in Op -
portunities & Announcements, students
have expressed an interest in expanding the
options for religious discussion. “There is a
lack of discussion about faith and spiritual -
ity on campus, and I think that intentionally
creating a space for that is great,” said Caro -
lyn Worthge (’11).  “It allows people of dif -
ferent faiths to live in community and be in
constant conversation while living out
their lives.”
According to Duntley, the
idea of the community has
been on the table before, but a
particular catalyst this year is
the Dean of Students, Celestino
Limas, who was hired last aca -
demic year. “Celestino has a par -
Volume 73, Number 1 News 2 the Pioneer Log, February 12, 2010
Pioneer
Log
the
Editors in ChiEf:
Nichole Carnell &
Angela Webber
nEws Editors :
Tom Meath &
Laura Nash
opinion Editors :
Garik Asplund &
Stephen Maxwell
fEatur Es Editors :
Deanna Horton &
Megan Quint
arts Editors :
Caitlin McCarthy &
Liam O’Connor
sports Editors :
Lindsey Bosse &
Michael G. Richman
BaCkdoor Editor:
Danny Garcia
stylE sourCE:
Kathryn Miller
illustration Editor:
Alina Larson
illustrator :
Brad Jonas &
Kelly Kuykendall
photo Editor:
Sam Margevicius
photographErs :
Karl Berger, Maggie Oliver,
Hannah Prince &
Hannah Rosales
hEad Copy Editor:
Missy Weldon
Copy Editors :
Robin Cedar, Kathleen Daly &
Jordan Eagan
staff writErs :
Mayme Berman, Joshua Kaplan,
Julia Stewart &
Evan Tenenbaum
BusinEss ManagEr :
Danny Garcia
advisor :
Stuart Kaplan
***
The pionEEr log serves to
inform the Lewis & Clark com -
munity on issues of concern
to students. We are commit -
ted to the free and articulate
expression of ideas. We do not
discriminate based on ethnic -
ity, gender, sexual orienta -
tion, disability, age or class.
We reserve the right to refuse
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and Editorials do not neces -
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Subscriptions available. Contact piolog @lClark .Edu for more information.CRIME BEATeat / Crime Beat / Crime Beat / Crime Beat / Crime Beat / Crime Bea Crime Beat / Crime Beat / Crime Beat / Crime Beat / Crime Beat / Crime Beat / Crime Beat / Crime BCrime Beat / Crime Beat /
t / Crime Beat / Crime Beat Native Africans share perspectives on U.S.
PHOTO BY SAM MARGEVICIUS
(Left to right) Visiting Professor of History Ousmane Traore, Brook Mentire (’11), Kemi Coutinho (’12) and Molly
Hetz (’12) discuss the perspective of native Africans integrating into American culture.
by Tom Meath
While much of Black History month fo -
cuses on the perspective of African-Amer -
icans in American culture, a recent discus -
sion panel explored the perspective of native
Africans. The panel, hosted by the ISLC
on T uesday in Thayer, featured talks by na -
tive African students Kemi Coutinho (’12)
and Brook Mentire (’11); Molly Hetz (’11),
who recently studied abroad in East Africa;
and Visiting Professor of History Ousmane
T raore from Senegal.
When Coutinho moved from Uganda to
the United States, the culture wasn’t as differ -
ent as she expected.
According to Coutinho, the biggest dif -
ferent was the transition from being an eth -
nic majority to a minority. She found herself
constantly reminded of her race.“I went to bed knowing I was black and I
woke up knowing I was black,” said Coutin -
ho. “When people talk about slavery, every -
one looks at me. Yet people are shy to call
me black.”
Mentire spoke about his preconceived
idea of the U.S. as an individualistic culture.
“I come from a very communal culture,”
said Mentire. “If I was eating from a bowl, I
would give you a spoon to eat from my bowl.
I came not expecting anyone to give me any -
thing. I found people who welcomed me to
their house and fed me.”
For Mentire, the biggest challenge was
the language barrier.
“Sometimes it is really frustrating when
you think you have a well-formulated
thought and you can’t articulate it,” said
Mentire.
T raore, who came to Lewis & Clark af -ter living in France for 16 years, is currently
teaching courses in the History of African
Slavery and Senegalese History.
“When I first arrived in the U.S., what
I discovered that shocked me a little bit is
the separation between communities,” said
T raore. “In France there are not places where
just black people or white people live.”
Hetz provided a foil to the discussion
with her American perspective on Africa.
She shared her experience living with a Ma -
sai family in East Africa and the connection
she made with her host mother that “tran -
scended tourism.”
All of the native Africans noted that de -
spite some of the difficulties in integrating,
their experiences were positive.
“I am grateful for being here,” said
Coutinho. “I have received far more than has
been taken from me.”
Faculty debate poster petition
idea came to Duntley from the 1980s, before
he worked at LC, when an offensive edito -
rial was published in the PioLog. In response,
faculty created a petition calling the editorial
and its argument abhorrent. He thought this
was a “great idea,” and thus drafted the pe -
tition, partnered with faculty members, and
then sent the petition to the CAS faculty and
staff e-mail lists.
“Reasonable people should disagree
about things that matter to them,” said Hill -
yer, who noted also that the use of the word
“divisive” in the discussion was an interest -
ing one. “The abolitionists were divisive,”
she said. “If people want to have conversa -
tions about racism, they need to be prepared
for discomfort.” Hillyer also recognized that
people were hurt and scared by the posters,
and realized she was “treading on very shaky
ground” making her arguments, but felt a re -
sponsibility to do so. “The language of safety
and comfort,” she said, “while important,
could cause people to retreat more into dis -
honesty and politeness instead of honest and introspection.”
Hillyer referred to language the adminis -
tration and others used regarding this inci -
dent. Dean of Students and Chief Diversity
Officer Celestino Limas wrote in an email
Feb. 8 regarding the poster incident: “Only
after we acknowledge the human impact of
this incident and support those who have
been victimized can we move ahead to the
other layers of this incident.”
All involved agreed that a new and dif -
ferent strategy should be engaged going for -
ward.
“There needs to be more systematic in -
quiry into race and ethnicity…instead of this
trend of just putting out fires,” said Hillyer.
“I think an academic institution that wants
its students to be politically engaged needs to
be careful about silencing free speech.”
“It is my hope that in the coming days,
weeks, and months, there will be more im -
portant tools than simple petitions that we
can employ together,“ wrote Duntley in an
e-mail to all CAS faculty Feb. 9, replying to
all the responses to his petition.
Interfaith theme hall plannedcontinued from pg. 1, POSTERS
a particular interest in diversity, including
religious, cultural background,” said Dunt -
ley. “He wants to see diversity in a broad
way, and I agree. He has a good vision for
this, so we were happy to talk about it."
The community will likely be housed in the
on-campus apartments.  The convenience of
kitchen facilities there helped encourage this
choice.  "A lot of religious activities center
around food," said Duntley. "This will give
them an opportunity to, in a communal way,
share traditional religious and cultural expe -riences that include food."
The current IFC mission statement en -
courages involved students to plan and par -
ticipate in religious and cultural activities for
the student body.  The specifics of the group,
however, are all but set in stone. "We're hop -
ing is that students will be co-creators in this.
The community can evolve the way it wants
to," said Duntley.  Fewer than 20 students
will likely be involved this year, but the plan
is for the concept to grow over time.
As with all themed floors, students can
apply for membership until Feb. 18. continued from pg. 1, FAITHAn employee reported a
harassment incident on Jan. 28.
An employee reported graffiti in
JR Howard Hall on Jan. 31.
An employee reported graffiti in
JR Howard Hall on Feb. 1.
A student reported their vehicle
window smashed in the Huston
Field parking lot on Feb. 1.
A student reported a theft from
their vehicle in the Huston Field
parking lot on Feb. 1.
A student was found to be
distributing a controlled
substance at Ponderosa Hall
on Feb. 1.
Employees reported graffiti at
Stewart and Copeland Halls on
Feb. 3.
An employee reported graffiti
outside the Central Plant and at
the Alumni Circle on Feb. 4.
An employee reported graffiti at
Hartzfeld Hall on Feb. 6.
A student reported a theft from
Alder Hall on Feb. 5.
Portland Police arrested an
individual for violating a trespass
warning on Feb. 6.3Opinion the Pioneer Log, February 12, 2010
The other night my friend and I were
watching movies. We were hungry and
so we decided to go to the store for some
munchies. We got a package of Oreos, a
bag of Doritos, and some ice cream. At the
checkout stand, I was reaching for my wal -
let when my friend said, “Don’t worry I got
this, I have food stamps, it’s free!” When I
heard this I was not quite sure what to think.
Should I take advantage of this opportunity
or should I say what I was thinking, “Aren’t
food stamps supposed to be for people in
need?” Later I found out that getting food
stamps is a relatively easy process as long as
you can show you have work-study. All you
really have to say is that your parents do not
give you money to live, and let’s face it, is the
government really going to dig too deeply to
find out if you are lying? Better yet, should
it have to?
What surprised me then was the num -
ber of Lewis & Clark students I saw getting
food stamps. These were not people one
would consider “needy.” I mean, don’t get
me wrong, some do benefit greatly by them
and that is in principle what they are there
for. On the contrary though, just because
you qualify does not make it necessary that
you get them. I have always had a lot of re -
spect for LC students and their tendencies towards policy-oriented jobs and communi -
ty involvement. One might infer from these
tendencies that we are geared towards help -
ing those around us and streamlining poli -
cies where needed, rather than participating
in the exploitation of those holes and flaws
in the system.
If you read a little history of the Food
Stamps Program and the Supplemental
Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) you
might find yourself wondering if the creators
and developers of the program ever fore -
saw the extent to which the program would
grow. Although the program began in 1939,
it did not develop into the basic format it
is seen in today until 1964 under President
Lyndon Johnson. In 1970 the program
helped 4.3 million people at a cost of $577
million. Since then it has grown at a rate that
is almost unbelievable. In 2008, our govern -
ment estimated over $28 billion going into
the Food Stamps Program to serve some
25.7 million people. The SNAP website
gives the details about the main beneficia -
ries of this welfare program. Among them,
76 percent of the money goes to households
with children, 33 percent of which are head -
ed by single parents. These are the families
who make less than $643 per month. They
need this money to survive, not just to make
things easier on them.
I am all for helping people in need, but when I see people buying microwavable
pizzas, ice cream, and soda with their food
stamps, I feel like the program isn’t doing
what it was intended for. Most of these are
problems inherent in the legislation and with
the government entities that manage these
programs; however, the individual must not
shirk their responsibilities to the communi -
ty. So I urge you, be honest with yourselves
and with others. If you can survive without
the food stamps, save them for those
who need them, and help to re -
work the underlying politi -
cal framework that allows
for such open exploita -
tion of scarce welfare
resources. We are lucky
enough to be in the po -
sitions we are in, be -
ing educated in a small,
intimate, private school set -
ting, something that should not be
taken for granted. We live in a place
that allows us such opportunities, and
the availability of such opportunities
in many ways depends on the partici -
pation and ethics of the population.
This is not meant to offend anyone; I
just wonder if people realize what they
are doing when they take advantage of
something such as this. Think about it
this way, if there is someone offering you cookies and there is someone next to you
starving, are you going to keep taking the
cookies? Or are you going to ask the person
giving them to you to help out the person
next to you who actually needs them, and
if they won’t, what are you going to do to
change that?
ILLUSTRATION BY ALINA LARSONLC, snap out of it! Do you really need food stamps?
by Scott Heirshberg
Recent hate speech; response from student leadership disappointing
After taking down the posters on January 28th, members of the Office
of Multicultural Affairs informed our student government of the incident.
Overall, the response was underwhelming. ASLC failed to respond to the
incident for nearly 24 hours and seemed far more concerned about the
smoking policy. Thus, their e-mail on the subject went out Friday after -
noon, eliminating almost any chance for immediate dialogue. But it isn’t
just ASLC. In August, all student leaders took part in a two-day inten -
sive workshop on how to facilitate conversations about diversity. This was
done with an emphasis on race, not because it is the only form of diversity,
but because focusing on one aspect allowed us to have a more complete
example of facilitation. Then why was it that, when an upset student went
to their RA to share the negative impact the incident had had on them,
they were told that they had misunderstood the intent of the posters and
that their feelings were wrong? Probably because most of the student
leaders didn’t care enough to take the training seriously—if they had even
attended at all.
Sometimes we forget that the Lewis & Clark Community does not
consist solely of undergraduate students. We have faculty and staff at this
institution who witnessed the civil rights movement and its impact on
their parents and family. Many of us seemed to lack the historical context
necessary to recognize that images of blackface are offensive. As members
of Generation Y, we have the luxury of ignorance, but other members of
our community don’t have that luxury. I was disappointed that we did not
respect or try to understand why faculty and staff were upset. We were
selfish and lazy, which seemed evident from the ratio of staff members
to students at events like the Growing Up Black in America panel. I had
hoped that a week after racially offensive posters targeting black people
were put up, there would be a larger student interest in supporting our
community members who shared their very personal stories about dealing
with racism and growing up as African-Americans.
If anything, the student response at the leadership institute, to the
swastika incident and to the events of the past few weeks, has shown that
many LC students have no idea how—or possibly no desire—to begin
talking about issues regarding race or other aspects of diversity. Cultural
competency is an education, not a state of being. Why are we so willing
to rally for problems across the globe, but so unwilling to talk about prob -
lems in our own backyard? Lewis & Clark presents us with some opportu -
nities to increase our cultural understanding, but these opportunities like
Black History, Hispanic Heritage, and Native Heritage month events, are
poorly attended, especially by undergraduate students. The Native Stu -
dent Union’s Pow-Wow has been canceled all together.
What does this say about the values of our community?
Tace James
Collge of Arts and Sciences, Class of 2010
Hanako Conrad
College of Arts and Sciences, Class of 2010Letters to
the EditorOpinions from the hallway
What do you think of the new smoking policy on campus?
Natalie Dole (’12) Kylie Cassidy (’12)
“I don’t care, because I won’t be on campus. I’m not
trying to fix what’s not broken.”“I think it will be hard to enforce.”
Ian McLane (’12) Ryan Jameson (’12)
“It has good intentions, but no matter what it will
displease a lot of people”“I think people should smoke wherever the fuck they
want to.”
Luke Rife (’11) Mireille Ngokion (’13)
“It seems a little bit extreme. I understand it on both
sides, but I don’t notice the effect of so many smok -
ers. It seems like of weird, outrageous, unfair maybe.”“I think it’s a difficult decision because the right to
smoke anywhere is a basic right, but so is the right to
not inhale it.”PHOTOS BY ALEXA JOHNSONRemember Kitty Genovese? She was a
woman who was stabbed to death in 1964
by a murderer and rapist while thirty-eight
witnesses looked on and did nothing. Each
one believed that someone else would take
action, so no one took responsibility. No one
called the police or intervened in any way,
all due to something called the bystander ef -
fect. Lewis & Clark, although admittedly to
a much lesser extent, has a problem with the
bystander effect.
For instance, this weekend the printer in
the Dubach Mac Lab was out of black ink.
Everyone who went to the Lab to print an ar -
ticle or an essay clicked “print,” walked over
to the printer to collect their assignment, and realized that each of their pages of text
had a wide swathe of white through it. Soon
there was a thick stack of half-blank pages.
However, no one called IT to report the
problem. No one even posted a sign to alert
their fellow students. Many print-counts
were unnecessarily depleted, because every -
one expected a more conscientious student
to do something.
A similar situation occurred recently in
the Stewart laundry room. T wo washing
machines broke and flooded. The sink was
clogged. Stagnant water sat in the basin of
the sink and the portals of one of the ma -
chines until the basement smelled like a
toilet. Yet no one called the phone number
posted on the wall to request a service man.
Or, how about when a teacher assigns an online reading assignment and the link does
not work? Not a student alerts the teacher to
this malfunction because they are afraid their
classmates will be annoyed with them for en -
suring that they will have to do the home -
work assignment that they should have had
to do anyway. They don’t want to be that kid.
They don’t want to call attention to them -
selves. But, honestly, we aren’t in high school
anymore.
In the Bon, when no one alerts the Bon
workers to the milk dispensers’ emptiness or
the lack of carrots in the salad bar, this is the
bystander effect. When no one volunteers to
answer a question in class, even if they know
the answer, this could also be construed as
the bystander effect.
Of course, in a situation such as Geno -
vese’s, we all protest that we would never be
the one who would just stand by. Each and
every one of us believes that we would have
dialed 911. Well, probably not, if the exam -
ples I have given are any evidence.
Thus, this is a call to arms. We claim to
be a conscientious community. Half of the
reason that most of us came to LC is because
the people were so welcoming. So, let’s help
each other out. Next time, let’s all call the
police.Volume 73, Number 1 Opinion 4 the Pioneer Log, February 12, 2010
Dear Hamslam,
I was so sad to read your column
today because it is wildly obvious that
you could only be so cynical if you
have been shut down so many times in
your life to have completely given up
hope or, you’ve just never been in love
because you are a womanizing, im -
mature, self-loathing individual. One
must love themselves before being able
to love or be loved. Cynicism will get
you nowhere in life. And just because
you’ve never been loved doesn’t mean
it doesn’t exist. There are so many peo -
ple out there that are truly happy and
in love, so where do you get off judg -
ing something you’ve never even had a
glimpse at?
Next week I hope you take the
time to answer this: How did you be -
come so cynical about relationships
and love?
Dear Reader,
You are right, dear reader, and I am
glad that you had the heart that I lack,
thank you for responding. I am a cyni -
cal person. You know all those movies
that show the jock who had his heyday
in high school and lives out the rest
of his life looking back, and saying,
“Man, those were the good times.” I
watch a lot of bad movies…
Well, I am the opposite. I believe
that the best is yet to come. I think
it highly irregular to write such a per -
sonal saga in such a public place, but
since you have placed such a provoca -
tive piece responding to last week’s
piece on love, I feel a heartfelt re -
sponse is required.
Grumble grumble…where was
I? Oh yes. In high school I was the
short hairy kid who got all the girls. I
dated, and wooed, and was always in
some kind of a relationship. The thing
about relationships, though, is that
you have to be ready for one, and you
have to be willing to dedicate yourself
with all your heart. My mom always
said, ”If you are going to do it, do it
right, never half-ass it!” Today I try to
live by the words of one of the most
important women in my life.
According to your assessment of
me, I have either “never been in love
because [I am] a womanizing, imma -
ture, self-loathing individual,” or I
“have been shut down so many times
in [my] life to have completely given
up hope.”
Well, unfortunately, neither is the
case, and your view should never be so
narrow as to dichotomize an individu -
al. You know people are more complex
than that. As I was saying, instead of
jumping into what I would say quali -
fies as love I must first be sure that the
person I am interested in is everything
my hopelessly romantic self is looking
for.
Enough said. Dear readers, I hope
you have a wonderful Valentines Day!
Love is real! Rejoice, and never read
so much into the media that you aim
personal attacks and judgments at
those who write to entertain and cap -
tivate your minds.
P .S. To the guys at Lewis & Clark—
let’s rally and not fuck this Valentines
Day up for the women of LC. Obvi -
ously they have lost hope in us.
P .P .S. Fuck that, I want roses—
somebody show me some romance!
by Laura NashThe office of the presidency
demands respect. Presidents’
Day is no different. But aside
from the killer sales, there is lit -
tle to celebrate come Monday,
Feb. 15.
Presidents’ Day celebrates,
in particular, two of the Unit -
ed State’s “greatest” presidents:
George Washington and Abra -
ham Lincoln. In grade school,
most students are taught the fun
facts of their lives. Honest Abe
was a resilient self-made man
and Washington ‘fessed up to
cutting down the cherry tree as a
young boy. The true measure of
these men, as well as the 42 oth -
ers who have served as president,
is how they acted in office. Ele -
mentary school stories are nice,
but what did these men do and
why did they do it? If all of us
were judged by our intentions
or even what we said, then there
would rarely be a rotten soul
among us. Actions speak louder
than words, and we should be
judged accordingly.
George Washington, along
with power-hungry Alexander
Hamilton, supported the ex -
pansion of federal power over
citizens when, in 1794, they led
an army of 13,000 against the
Whiskey Rebels. To date, Wash -
ington remains the only sitting
president to personally lead
troops in an act of war. This stint
did little to solve any real prob -
lems – only 20 “rebels” were ar -
rested, and most were later par -
doned by Washington. Whiskey was an important
part of life because it served as
money and it also allowed farm -
ers to make use of any excess
grain. None of that mattered
to Hamilton, who wanted the
Whiskey Act “more as a mea -
sure of social discipline than as
a source of revenue.” The main
reason why Hamilton pushed
for the tax, and later the squelch -
ing of the rebellion, was to estab -
lish the supremacy, i.e. tyranny,
of federal rule.
Lincoln, despite the rhetoric
for which he is remembered, or -
dered the needless slaughter of
hundreds of thousands in the
United States and the Confed -
eracy. The Gettysburg Address
is a great speech, but highlights
the irony of Lincoln’s actions as
president. The Union fought to
expand its power and domina -
tion over the South, not to “pre -
serve” the Union. Lincoln was
also a railroad insider who made
shady deals with the wealthy,
supported the Free Soil move -
ment—an overtly racist set of
policies—and headed the Il -
linois Colonization League,
which wished to deport blacks
to Liberia. Most of these arti -
facts are forgotten, however, and
he is regularly idolized.
The Civil War had nothing
to do with fighting over control
of a single government. Rather,
the South was defending its own
right to freedom from Union
rule, and so the conflict is more
accurately named The War to
Prevent Southern Independence.
In many ways, Lincoln also pre -sided over the first industrial
war. He and his generals set the
precedent of trench warfare and
killing citizens en masse, among
other detestable procedures.
Even before the war start -
ed, Lincoln’s true intentions
showed. He passed the Mor -
rill Tariffs that hurt the South.
Later, after all the Democratic
opposition had left Congress,
he implemented the Homestead
Act, which gave away vast tracts
of land at fire-sale rates; Pacific
Railway Acts, one of the most
corrupt acts in US history; Na -
tional Banking Acts, establish -
ing fiat currency and reinstating
the national banking system. He
also created the first income tax
in American history.
Skipping over a slew of presi -
dents, FDR installed a Ponzi
scheme larger than anything
Madoff could have dreamt called
Social Security, tried to flood the
Supreme Court with those who
favored him, and presided over
the largest war state. He inher -
ited a government budget that
represented barely 3.4 percent
of GDP and, after all of his pro -
grams, left it at over 12 percent
and growing before WWII.
T ruman followed this up
with the atomic bomb, setting
up the UN, getting heavily in -
volved in conflicts in Asia—
first in the Korean War, fiercely
backing Taiwan in 1949, and
finally by planting seeds via the
CIA in Vietnam. On the home
front he forced unions in coal,
steel, and railways to break their
strikes by threatening a military draft. The rest of the presidents’
records are just as bleak.
Obama, too, has made much
use of his power as president.
He has expanded the war in Af -
ghanistan by 30,000 troops, but
at least he has promised to with -
draw troops soon. Aid, both mil -
itary and non-military, to Paki -
stan has skyrocketed, and the
war has been expanded deeper
into Waziristan. Special forces
have been used in Yemen, and
so on. His budget freeze is pal -
try and a joke. Pushing reform
on healthcare ignores the rights
of patients and doctors, eroding
the very virtues that make Amer -
ica stand out and adding to the
nation’s debt. For comparison’s
sake, the budget deficit of 2010
will be 12.3 percent of GDP . Yes,
this year’s budget deficit is now a
larger portion of GDP than the
entire budget was in 1941.
His rhetoric remains strong
and hopeful, but his actions do
not reflect his promises. Sad -
ly, Obama has not been the
“change” we believed in, but has
been the “more of the same” that
no one wanted. The complacen -
cy of the public towards budget
deficits and war on the one hand,
paired with its enthusiasm for
health care and economic “stabi -
lization” on the other will make
change from the status quo dif -
ficult. It’d be wise to finally take
a consistent stance and hope for
a day when, as H.L. Mencken
wrote, the president again has no
ideas and is not a nuisance. Hap -
py Presidents’ Day, and have fun
shopping!
Don’t just stand there - do somethingPresidents’ Day: A critical perspective
ILLUSTRATION BY ALINA LARSONADVERTISEMENTby Garik Lawson AsplundFeatures 5 the Pioneer Log, February 12 , 2010
Style Source
by Kathryn Miller

nine days out >>>>
friday saturday sunday
monday tuesday wednesday
thursday friday saturday12 13 14
15 16 17
18 19 20February 12 to 20
Pyramidd & The Shaky Hands
Sponsored by LCMC
Stamm, 9 p.m.Write something for the Lit Review!
Submit your poetry, short fiction, and essays to lcreview@
Deadline February 21
China Night
Raffle Prizes!
The Bon, 5-7 p.m.Ralph Ellison’s Three Days Before The Shooting
A Black History Month event
Agnes Flanagan Chapel, 7:30 p.m.
Saturday Service Project: Planting Native Plants
Sponsored by 3CE: contact alisond@ to sign up
8:15 a.m. - 12:30 p.m.Apocalips Poetry Slam and Qualifier for Nationals
Featuring Sierra DeMulder, National Slam Champ
Trail Room, 7:30 p.m.Once Upon a Weekend
Semester-ly short student play festival
Black Box, Fir Acres, 10 p.m.patent leather. pink lipstick. curry. navy nail polish. fried chicken. “the tudors.” david lebovitz. salted caramel. leopard print.
“lipstick. yeah it sucks sometimes. i read that the average woman ingests five pounds of lipstick each year, but it smells so damn good.”
My Neighbor, My Killer: Cascade Festival of Int’l Films
Contact agkent@ to reserve a spot in a van
Showing at PCC at 7:30 p.m., vans leave LC at 6:20 p.m.LC Basketball @ George Fox: Rooterbus!
$3 for bus, pizza, and ticket: reservations to MSC 1256
Bus leaves at 4:15 p.m. from T empleton
Mayme Melody Berman
Los Angeles, California
English :: 2010
“i definitely don’t
think you should as -
sociate your identi -
ty with what you pur -
chase. do fashion for
the art. It’s special
because it’s a wear -
able art, one that can
move and adjust to in -
dividuals. So when I
feel down I dress up
and feel good.”
swank : indulgent : calculated : class that art::
“in my ideal closet,
there would be a really
silly victorian chaise
lounge and a big old
chandelier. i would like
for it to be a space,
a dressing room, be -
cause sometimes i like
to get dressed up with
other people. and i al -
ways take twenty or so
to throw some outfits
around.”closet of dreams::
hello my diamond you know, you only paid for half a shirt. “they name lipsticks. they call this one ‘rose energie.’”
into it:: the inspirations ::
“napoleon. but that’s
just lifestyle choices.”
<< from the mama
avoid it ::>> these are made of pony hairVolume 73, Number 1 Features 6 the Pioneer Log, February 12, 2010
HOW TO:
Make your own valentines
by Sanne Stienstra
ILLUSTRATION BY ALINA LARSONProfessor and students create stress workshop series
by Deanna HortonCollect old wrapping paper, magazines, cards and fun scrap
paper. The best places to find these things if you don’t already
have them: the Bins, SCRAP , other Goodwills, Salvation Army
and garage sales. Amassing your collection of materials to use at
any time is half the fun.1
2
3
4
5Gather your other necessary materials, like scissors, glue,
staplers and tape. Mod Podge or rubber cement are the best
glues for making cards because they aren’t messy and don’t
leave bumps under your paper. Old books are also great for
cutting things out of and they are always available at the Bins.
One tactic for making Valentine’s Day cards: as many
different hearts as you can fit on one card! Do more hearts
equal more love?
Another useful method for card-making in general is
layers. Some girls like to layer tank tops, but crafty card
connoisseurs know how to layer different patterns and
shapes.
Stickers, cut-out shapes and comics are all great things to
paste to the front of your Valentine’s Day card. Consider a
joke for the inside, such as: “What did the pickle say to the
other pickle on Valentine’s Day?”
“You mean a great dill to me!”
Five Lewis & Clark psychology majors
and Visiting Professor of Psychology Dawn
Salgado have created a series of workshops to
reduce the stress level of students on campus.
In Fall 2009, Salgado asked her Health
Psychology students to create a hypotheti -
cal campus-wide intervention that would
help LC students. After coming up with the
idea of a stress reduction strategy interven -
tion, Chelsea Miller (’10), Sarah Alejandrino
(’10), Jessica Burchett (’11), Lin McElroy
(’10), Emilee Mahan (’10) and Emily Wil -
son (’10) volunteered to actually implement
it and establish themselves as the BeStress -
Free team.
“The first process in the project was actu -
ally conducting a needs assessment to deter -
mine if these workshops were necessary and
if students would want to attend this type of
thing,” said Burchett. “The response we got
was pretty astounding.”
Out of the 106 LC students that com -
pleted the interest survey, 94 percent said that they experienced at least moderate stress
during the previous semester.
Research shows that college students to -
day experience an increased level of stress
compared to students 15 years ago and per -
ceived stress negatively impacts academic
performance.
“We’re essentially putting everything we
learned in Psychology Methodology to the
test and developing our skills as researchers,”
said Burchett. “I think it would be a struggle
to do this project without some knowledge
of psychology and the research process.”
The members of the BeStressFree team all
contributed equally to the project by con -
ducting literature and peer reviews to com -
pile appropriate, evidence-based treatment
for stress. All members helped to create the
campus needs assessment survey, submit a
proposal in order to receive permission from
the Human Subjects Research Committee to
pass ethical guidelines, and apply for SAAB
funds for the workshops.
“The ideas for our workshops are not only
examined and backed up by research, but many of us have used these exercises in order
to reduce stress, and can say that they have
worked for us,” said Miller.
Fret Free February will feature organi -
zational strategy advice from BeStressFree
team members Mahan and Alejandrino on
Feb 17. On Feb. 18 a Campus Living repre -
sentative will host a discussion and give ad -
vice about conflict resolution.
Marching into Mindfulness March will
have a workshop on March 3 presented by
a local dialectic behavioral therapy (DBT)
specialist focusing on mindful eating prac -
tices and BeStressFree members Miller and
Alejandrino will speak about healthy eating.
A mindfulness meditation session will be led
by a licensed psychologist on March 4.
Stretch Your Stress Away April will fea -
ture a yoga session by certified yoga instruc -
tor and LC student Rachael Munkacsi (’12)
on April 2. On April 3, a volunteer day will
be held so that students can reduce stress by
helping the community.
The last set of workshops, Stress Relief
Now, will include an animal therapy session on April 23 with Newfoundland dogs of the
Pacific Northwest Newfoundland Club. A
licensed massage therapist will provide neck
and back massages on April 29 and 30. Be -
StressFree members Burchett and McElroy
will also host an artistic expression workshop
focusing on gratitude on these days.
“The project in general has been a great
way to learn about the process and steps that
are actually involved in applied research,”
said Burchett. “It’s fun. It’s a lot of work, but
it’s fun. And I think it’ll be really rewarding.”PHOTOS BY SANNE STIENSTRA7Features the Pioneer Log, February 12, 2010
by Mayme Berman
A pastrami sandwich on rye bread from Portland’s
Kenny and Zuke’s Delicatessen.
Eavesdropping
“I want to be a
pageant mom when
I grow up.”
“When I get bro -
ken up with it’s like
‘what can I eat?’
Usually it’s ribs.” Dance team wraps up its second season
by Nichole CarnellOn a surprisingly pleasant Monday after -
noon I ventured downtown to Kenny and
Zuke’s Delicatessen, on the corner of 11th
and Stark, in search of the perfect Reuben.
I was lead to this deli by the buzz that has
surrounded it as a result of author and deli
expert David Sax’s fondness for its in-house
smoked meats and fresh baked bread.
On February 2, Kenny and Zuke’s host -
ed a signing party for Sax’s latest book, Save
the Deli. Additionally, the Kenny and Zuke’s
Reuben is a favorite of local Yelpers and
foodies alike. For example, posted on the res -
taurant’s website is a quote from Matt Kram -
er of the Oregonian , in which he claims the
Reuben at Kenny and Zuke’s is so good that,
“You’ll be naming your first born after it.”
There is no denying that Kenny and
Zuke’s is in a prime location. I arrived to find
the dining room brimming with happy cus -
tomers basking in the sunlight that poured
in through the sky-high windows.
The restaurant is on the same block as the
Ace Hotel and its restaurant, Clyde Com -
mon. As a result, the dining room at Kenny
and Zuke’s is a mixed bag. There are equal
parts business people, tourists from the Ace
Hotel and hipsters, who all share a common
craving – simple deli food. What immediately caught my attention
when I opened the menu was a proud ban -
ner at the top, stating “We cure, pickle, and
smoke quality meats and fishes according to
the highest standards and oldest traditions.”
When asked, my waitress confirmed this:
Everything is made in-house – from the rye
bread to the pastrami. The only things made
off the premises are their French fries (which,
for some reason, they buy frozen).
I ordered the Reuben ($12.75), and
my dining partner chose pastrami on rye
($11.75). Although both sandwiches were
carefully constructed with flavorful and high
quality ingredients, both were flawed in their
execution.
According to fellow Jew and self-pro -
claimed deli aficionado Jake Mendelson
(’10), a true Reuben should consist of fresh
rye bread, thinly sliced corned beef and copi -
ous amounts of sauerkraut.
Opting for a more rustic look, Kenny
and Zuke’s slices the meat about a quarter of
an inch thick and dresses the Reuben with
a light smattering of both Russian dressing
and sauerkraut.
In the Oregonian ’s review of the restaurant
from January 2008, Michael C. Zusman
provides an explanation for the restaurant’s
break with tradition: “Instead of the usual
thin strips spewed from a slicer, this pastrami
The Lewis & Clark dance team, two years
in the making, is finally finding its footing.
The team hopes to impress at its last halftime
performance of the year on Saturday. Captain
and choreographer Serena Anchetta (’12) has
been with the team since its conception two
years ago and takes care of everything, from
solving last-minute ribbon crises to schedul -
ing practices and getting funding.
The dance team will close its season at
halftime during the LC men’s basketball
game beginning at 6 p.m. Saturday evening.
The performance will feature male athletes in
a co-ed “salsa/swing dance” mash-up of two
hit songs by Pitbull and Cobra Starship.
“People are going to be really surprised at
how it turned out,” Anchetta said.
“Serena does a good job with rallying sup -
port for the dance team in the community,”
said veteran member Lil Ryan (’10). “Serena
is the reason why we still have a dance team.”Anchetta took the reigns of the blossom -
ing dance team last year after it was estab -
lished by Kelsey Domann (’10). Anchetta
has risen to the occasion splendidly, leading
in both performances. She has also led in
promoting the team, which has doubled in
size under her leadership.
Funded as a club through ASLC, the
dance team has survived without a chore -
ographer or dance advisor. Gaining support
from Assistant Football Coach Phil Mag -
banua as its faculty advisor and from Dean
of Students Celestino Limas, who acts as as -
sistant director of athletics- facilities and stu -
dents, the dance team has been able to rise in
the ranks. Anchetta said to watch for a final
performance from the team in a showcase
in April. She added that she hopes for the
spring showcase to grow into a competition
in the future.
Be sure not to miss the team’s performance
at the men’s basketball game in the Pamplin
Sports Complex on Saturday at 6 p.m. is hand-sliced to
a quarter-inch
thickness. This
comes, I’m sure,
from a clearly
thought-out rec -
ognition that the
resonant savor
and texture of
this remarkable
pastrami cannot
be fully appreci -
ated in a thinner
slice.”
Personally, I
believe that the
beauty of a tra -
ditional deli sand -
wich is the meat’s ability to carry a smoky
taste and delicately chewy texture in even
the thinnest of slices. And without the extra
dressing and sauerkraut, Kenny and Zuke’s
Reuben is much neater than traditional ren -
ditions, which in theory is a good thing but
in taste is just plain wrong.
While I commend Kenny and Zuke’s for
its skillful creations of house-smoked meat
and home made breads and bagels, there is
more to the perfect Rueben than these fac -
tors alone.
As for sides, the potato salad was exactly as it should be, vinegary instead of smoth -
ered in mayo, and when washed down with
Dr. Brown’s Cream Soda ($2.75) it almost
made me forget about the disappointing
Reuben.
I ended my meal with a taste of both
the home made rugelach and hamentashen,
and found that they were sweeter and more
doughy than I would have wanted.
Overall, I appreciate Kenny and Zuke’s
for their classy rendition of old school deli-
style fare, but at $13 a sandwich, it just
didn’t hit the spot.
Students tutor housekeeping staff, Sky -
line Building Maintenance employees, in
English as part of the student-led Coalition
for English Education and Social Advocacy
(CEESA).
The housekeepers are predominantly
Spanish-speakers, but some are native Eng -
lish-speakers who want more help, said Vice
President of CEESA Tala Al-Mangour (’12). 
Al-Mangour thinks that the tutoring is
worthwhile. It is her second year of tutoring
her tutee, Sandra, and Al-Mangour said that
she has become friends with Sandra in addi -
tion to helping her learn English.
Also, tutoring helps create ties between
the housekeeping staff and students, accord -
ing to CEESA tutor Alison Dubchansky
(’12). “T utoring is a great opportunity to
make Skyline employees feel that they are a
part of our campus and that we appreciate all
the work that they do,” Dubchansky said in
an e-mail.
Al-Mangour encouraged students to join.
“Don’t feel weird about not knowing
Spanish well,” she said. CEESA members tutor LC’s housekeepers in English
by Joshua Kaplan
Hanna Kaiser (’12) and Skyline employee Carmen from Mexico City meet
Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays during Carmen’s lunch break.PHOTO BY KARL BERGERThe only requirements for anyone seek -
ing to become a tutor are some knowledge
of Spanish and free time to tutor from 11:30
a.m. to 12:00 p.m. at least once a week.
CEESA also does social advocacy for the
Skyline housekeepers. A former group, Jus -
tice for Janitors, which became a part of CEESA, helped the housekeepers unionize,
said former CEESA advisor Kelly Hoover.
As far as current advocacy, CEESA Presi -
dent Hannah Kaiser (’12) said that she is
“in the very earliest stages of trying to start
a project that may help the housekeepers be -
come employees of the school.”Each tutor works with a tutee for half an
hour, working on subjects on which the tu -
tee wants to focus. Most of the tutees learn
from different tutors twice a week, some -
times more often.
The tutors are fairly independent, rarely
all meeting together, Al-Mangour said.
T utors submit weekly progress reports af -
ter tutoring sessions, which occur during the
worker’s break in the residence hall that he
or she cleans.
Students run the English-tutoring orga -
nization started by Satya Byock (’04) in the
early 2000s, now school-sponsored and sup -
ported. Last semester, CEESA had 10 tutees
and 15 tutors, according to Kaiser. 
Dubchansky said that teaching her
housekeeper English has allowed her to prac -
tice her Spanish, as well as her teaching skills.
As far as improving teaching skills, Dub -
chansky said in an e-mail, “It is tough to
teach a foreign language to someone in such
short sessions (30 minutes), but it has forced
me to be prepared for every session, knowing
in advance what I will teach at each one.”
For more informa tion on CEESA or if you would
like to volunteer email ceesa@lclark.edu.Kenny and Zuke’s: A PNW deli
Selena Anchetta (’12) and Raul
Millan (’13) practice for Saturday’s
performance.PHOTO BY MAYME BERMAN
Volume 73, Number 1 Arts 8 the Pioneer Log, February 12, 2010
GET
OFF
YER
ASSBassnectar makes sweet, sweet beats
by Evan TenenbaumPHOTO BY HANNAH ROSALES
If you can remember what you did on Friday night, it
means you probably weren’t raging to Bassnectar at the Rose-
land…and boy, did you miss one hell of a party.
For those of you not familiar with the ‘womp-tastic’ elec-
tro-music scene currently sweeping through PDX and much of the country, let me paint a picture for you. As you walk in the venue, you immediately feel the music being played even before you can really hear it. Once you’re inside the concert hall you’re surrounded by hundreds of /f_l ailing body-parts. /T_h e sweet and sour smell of sweat and weed waft up your nose, while you can taste a hint of chemicals on the tip of your tongue. As you look from one /f_l ailer to next, you real-ize that almost everyone has a goofy grin on his or her face.
Squeezing your way through the crowd, you realize that
many of these bass-crazed maniacs are some of the same sane, intelligent people you were sitting in class with only hours before! All of the sudden your arms start to move uncontrol-lably, your legs start bouncing, and your head starts wob-bling so hard you worry it may fall off . You’re in the midst of a hippie-rave, and it’s awesome!
/T_h e one-man rage machine that is Bassnectar kept the
crowd wobbling with his down and dirty, bass-gasmic elec-
tronic music. Mashing up everything from /T_h ree 6 Ma/f_i a
Mixing cartoonish and pop sounds, Odd
Blood sounds like what would happen if
/T_h ey Might Be Giants wanted to try a pleth-ora of trendy indie tropes. /T_h at said, the re-cord works pretty well.
Starting with one of its more off -putting
tracks, Odd Blood segues into a fantastically catchy lead single. Bouncing percussion ac-companies lead singer Chris Keating’s vocals, with a falsetto chorus. Singing largely agree-able lines—”You must stick up for yourself son/never mind what anybody else done”— Keating’s voice is still pleasant enough to get them stuck in your head.
/T_h e next track, “Madder Red” has a mel-
ody reminiscent of MGMT’s song “Kids,” but Yeasayer’s track has solid variations (whereas “Kids” drags on without variations that can match the main verse).
With “Madder Red,” the album reduces
its playful tone, taking on a slightly stoic stance that may occasionally look ridiculous. In fact, this tone matches the album cover of a /f_i gure looking serious-faced into the distance with a weird, unrealistic, comput-er-generated texture covering his face and clothes.Picking up the cheerful pace again with
the other single, “O.N.E.,” Odd Blood utiliz-es Yeasayer’s trademark synth, guitar, vocals and weird, complex percussion. “O.N.E.” continues the other single, Ambling Alp’s, tradition of independence. “Hold me like you used to/Control me like you used to/No, you don’t move me anymore/and I’m
glad that you don’t,” Keating sings, accom-
panied by myriad catchy synth riff s.
Sci-/f_i dinosaur-like noises recur along
with building piano, synth and bubbly per-cussion throughout the next track, “Love
Me Girl,” taking almost two minutes before Keating starts singing. Relying more on vo-cal harmonies rather than synth, “Love Me
Girl” could almost sound like a song by a
regular band if not for the aforementioned
dinosaur-like noises, which reappear in later choruses.
“Love Me Girl” is pretty memorable
song, if the listener has the patience for the sci-/f_i eff ect-heavy beginning.
“Rome,” the next track, also depends on
vocals, but verges toward irritation with its clichéd repeating line “it’s just a matter of
time.” Lyrics aside, though, “Rome” still has
enough clever melodies to keep one’s /f_i nger
from the skip button. to Imogen-Heap, the San Francisco native played for three
hours straight, turning the Roseland into a gigantic, bass-/f_i lled sauna. Anyone there who didn’t happen to be on some
sort of illicit chemical still got super high off of the huge
sound-system Bassnectar tours with.
As usual, Bassnectar delivered the party his live shows
are famous for. An added surprise was the Roseland /T_h e-
ater, which really pulled its act together. With no drug-dogs
or cavity searches, the “friendlier” security was a welcomed
change from the Roseland’s typical asshole bouncers.
People were blazing openly, getting naked, and even
dancing on stage by the end of the show. While the acoustics
of the venue are not superb, there was so much bass being
thrown around that at points I felt like I was literally drown-
ing in decibels.
/T_h e one major complaint I had about the show is how
pricey it was. Most people paid over $25 after service fees,
which is a ridiculous amount to pay to see a single well-
known DJ. While the experience as a whole was well worth
it, it’s the concept that’s disturbing. Perhaps next time he’s
in Portland, Bassnectar will play a few nights in a row at a smaller, cheaper venue.
Overall the music and vibes were great, my feet still hurt,
my ears are still ringing, and I can’t wait to do it all over
again.
Yeasayer’s Odd Blood reviewed
by Joshua Kaplan
For this Valentine’s Day:
the “Love Hurts” edition
If you haven’t seen “Teeth” yet, do. A teenage girl dis-
covers the very real meaning of vagina dentata, leaving both
would-be rapists and well-meaning dweebs ravaged in her
wake. Not a plot line easily forgotten. You’ll be screech-
ing and laughing along with a packed house. Presented by
Professor Claudia Nadine, the Gender Studies department and the Womyn’s Center, followed by a student-led panel discussion. Free. Feb. 12 at 7 p.m. in Miller 105.
Decked out like some strange combination of hipsters,
old-school rappers and drag queens, Pyramiddd (former-
ly Starfucker) comes up with some seriously sweet pop hooks. Seeing them play is like being a teenager in love:
excited, curious, nervous and unable to stop dancing. /T_h e
Shaky Hands will start the show with their brand of jan-
gly, folk inspired rock. Free. Feb. 12 at 9 p.m. in Stamm.
“Are you planning on spending Valentine’s Day alone?
Are you desperate for some form of consolation? What
could be more comforting than an evening discussing
love with people who know a thing or two about it?” So says the email announcing the Pamplin Society’s discus-
sion on love, led by Professors Lyell Asher, Bruce Podobnik
and Yueping Zhang. Go to the Pamplin Room in Watzek
Library on Feb. 15 at 7 p.m. to drown your post-V. Day
sorrows accordingly.
/T_h e chick-/f_l ick turned musical sensation, Legally
Blonde: /T_h e Musical will have you dancing in the aisle
and thinking, “I’ll show him, I’ll get into law school,” after
it’s /f_i rst number. Nominated for the seven Tony awards in 2007, and deemed, “An Elle of a Show” by Time Magazine,
this toe-tapping hit will be a single-lady’s post-Valentine’s Day to remember. Plus, there are really cute dogs in the
show. Who needs a man when you have a puppy to love?
Feb. 16-21 at the Keller Auditorium. Tickets start at $25.
“Up and coming contemporary Photographer” Drew Lenihan (’12) took this
photo in San Francisco last spring break on a roadtrip with friends. It suggests the freedom of the road and the in/f_i nite potential of the great American roadtrip.
If you’d like to see your work featured in the PioLog, send your photos and cap-
tions to piolog@lclark.edu. —Kathryn Wlodarczyk
Photo of the week
IMAGE FROM YEASAYER9Arts the Pioneer Log, February 12, 2010
Home , a /f_i lm written and directed by
Ursula Meier, is about a French family living
in seclusion in the country. /T_h ere is nothing really spec-tacular about them, except that their house is the only one around for miles, and their front lawn abuts an abandoned highway. Sun shines down on the golden /f_i elds that sur-round them, and toys and an armchair dot the deserted road. /T_h e family, kept in their isolated bubble, is content and relaxed in their daily routines and chores. Like many French /f_i lms, Home is speckled with a generous helping of
casual nudity and violent family disputes. Still, the former only highlights the close bond the family shares and the unobtrusiveness of outside norms on their pleasant life.
Yet, this is soon disrupted by the construction and
reopening of the highway. It becomes clear that the in-creased noise and loss of privacy are gravely aff ecting the serene dynamic that once characterized the inhabitants. /T_h e score, most notably telling this growing change, is nearly nonexistent at /f_i rst, but increases with the drone of the highway and ominous violin pieces.
As the sound forces the family to retreat more and
more inside the diminishing shelter of their home, the viewer questions the family unit’s stability. Meier adeptly turns a simple story of the world encroaching on one aver-age family into a haunting parable of the evanescent and inde/f_i nable quality that makes a true home. —Ashley Davis
Feb. 15 at 8 p.m., Regal Broadway Cinemas (1000 SW
Broadway). You know that feeling you get when news stations give
in to their excessive multitasking tendencies? Ribbons of text run along the bottom of the screen, multiple smaller boxes of live action footage encroach on the newscaster’s ever-concerned face, and suddenly the increasing accounts of A.D.D. no longer seem so surprising. Run-on sentences
are okay because they save time and fact-based news stories which initially received crazed media attention are drama-
tized further because they can’t make this stuff up! At the
end of the broadcast you’re chewed up and spat out and it’s
only then that you realize you really weren’t that interested to begin with.
Similar to that is a feeling throughout Andre Techine’s
/T_h e Girl on the Train, which is, as announced
just before credits roll, based on actual events. /T_h ough humble enough to repeat out/f_i ts within the timeframe of the movie, the scandalous life of Jeanne (Émilie Dequenne) is not exactly what one might imagine in Parisian suburbs. Jeanne is a beautiful unemployed rollerblading a/f_i cionado who gets caught up in a series of events which all seem avoidable and, frankly, not that interesting. /T_h e young woman’s desperate craving for attention is the motive for faking an anti-Semitic attack against herself on a train. /T_h e details are insigni/f_i cant but expanded on for the sake of a feature /f_i lm. /T_h e story could be told in two minutes on CNN (with text ribbons and various footage boxes) and the /f_i lm would /f_i t in better on the Lifetime network. —Margaret Adams
Feb. 17 at 8:15 p.m., Whitsell Auditorium (934 SW Salm-on); Feb. 18 at 8:30 p.m., Regal Broadway Cinemas (1000 SW Broadway).
/T_h e Pioneer Log: How long have you been working with Ellison’s 2,000 pages of manu-script?John Callahan: Mrs. Ellison took me into Ralph’s study shortly after his funer-al in April 1994, and asked for help sifting through what he’d left of his second novel. Summer of 1994 I had the boxes containing the print outs shipped to Portland, where I asked Adam Bradley, who was my student and had studied Invisible Man in my class if
he would be my research assistant and xerox and catalogue the materials.
Adam and I worked on the volume
on-and-off for 15 years, taking time off for various other pursuits. From 2000 on Adam and I went to work in earnest on the edition just /uni00A0 published. We began to shape the volume, which involved start-ing almost from scratch to go through once more, in my case, and for the /f_i rst time, completely, in Adam’s every scrap
of germane material in the Ellison Papers.
PL: You became friends with Ellison at the
end of the ’70s, right? Did you talk to him in detail about the novel he was working on
in a friendly capacity, and if so how did that
help you in your role as executor and editor?
JC: Ralph was very private about the second novel. /uni00A0When he wanted to talk about it, he would, but I didn’t pester him. From time
to time he’d show me a passage he felt good
about./uni00A0Sometimes he’d mention his work on
it with exhilaration, at others with weariness.
Our conversations gave me a sense of
his ups and downs and of the weave he
was striving for with characters, form, and plot, and that informed my sense of the magnitude of what he aimed for in
the second novel, and perhaps helped me slowly come to grips with the fact that he was not really near to /f_i nishing one com-
plete novel by the time he passed away.
PL: All of the reports and reactions to /T_h ree
Days Before the Shooting that I’ve read focus
on the behemoth task set to you and Adam
Bradley as editors of the manuscript. How
much of yourself is in this work?
JC: Sometimes when you yield yourself up to someone else’s work, /f_i nished or un-/f_i nished, you put yourself fully into it pre-
cisely by trying your best to keep yourself
out of it, by not straining to answer un-
answerable questions like, “Why didn’t Ralph /f_i nish the book in forty years?” Rather you do your best to be satis/f_i ed
with what is there, real in front of you.
PL: Relatedly, has the reception during the
book tour thus far been more about El-lison’s writing or your editing? How about
teaching a class on literary editing at LC?
JC: As much as possible Adam and I have to
focus on our editing as a prologue to talking about Ellison’s book--his narratives--and the totality of his work, including Invisible Man.
In the same way the editing tries at every turn
to showcase what Ellison wrote--his multiple
un/f_i nished narratives--and get out of the way.
PL: In what way should /T_h ree Days Before
the Shooting be approached and studied?
Correct me if I’m wrong, but it’s not ex-
actly a novel, yet miles beyond ephemera…JC: Like what it is: the multiple, related if not clearly interlocking narratives of what was potentially a saga. /uni00A0Your phrase “. . . not
exactly a novel, yet miles beyond ephemera”
is a wonderful characterization./uni00A0If you read it in that way, dipping in and out, you can’t go wrong and
the work will reward you
as a long-
distance friend does with in-tensely close
and satisfy-
ing conversations.
PL: I take it this
project lasted a
bit longer than
you anticipated.
Given its con-tent, is there any-thing particularly
apt in its release now, the second year of
our /f_i rst black president’s administration?
JC: /T_h at Ellison’s un/f_i nished novel should emerge now in the second year of Barack Obama’s administration is an intrigu-
ing coincidence. /uni00A0Its focus is on matters of
identity and race; it is provisional, like the
country it portrays. /uni00A0 It is a work in prog-ress testing its readers, just as President Obama’s work tests each and every Ameri-
can citizen in profound and complex ways.
PL: /T_h is is a goofy question, but what
is your favorite part about the book? If you were an outsider to this whole thing,
what do you think would grab you?
JC: For me a sentence like this on 409
of /T_h ree Days and the pages that follow in
Book II (410-412) are incredibly arresting in their simultaneously historical and prophet-
by Caitlin McCarthy
Mid-August Lunch , Italy, made me feel all
warm inside, like sitting in the sun beside the grassy
bank of an urban river with a cool glass of white wine. /T_h e light blue-greens and soft yellows of the Kodak /f_i lm and the accordion and pizzicato licks set the mood for this sensual movie with minimal plot. It’s not that there isn’t a plot, but the plot is lazy, moving slowly and peacefully like the old women who inhabit its frames.
Gianni is a man beyond his prime, caring for his 93
year old mother in the ancient apartment they share to-gether. When their debt runs too high, Gianni is wea-seled into taking care of three more elderly women dur-ing the holiday weekend of Ferragosto. /T_h e women trickle in like a comedy of errors, bringing along special dietary needs and backdoor bickering. /T_h e plot contin-ues with such minor ebbs and /f_l ows, and Gianni comes to terms with his role as friendly companion and care-giver, all the while satiated by white wine and cigarettes.
Mid-August Lunch was written and directed by Gi-
anni Di Gregorio (co-writer of the Scorsese-produced Gommorah), who also played the main role. /T_h e /f_i lm
was released in 2008 and has since won eight awards throughout various international /f_i lm festivals, includ-ing best editing, best new director and best screenwrit-er. —Sam Margevicius
Feb. 13 at 6:15 p.m. and Feb. 14 at 5:45 p.m., Regal Broadway Cinemas (1000 SW Broadway). ILUSTRATION BY KELLY KUYKENDALLThe 33rd Portland International Film Festival is offi cially
upon us. The Pioneer Log presents a taster for those cin-
ematically inclined. Tickets $10. See nwfi lm.org for more.ic dimensions of private and public reality:
“Nine owls have squawked out the rules and the hawks will talk, so soon they’ll come marching out of the woodpile and the wood-work--sore-head, sore-foot, right up close, one-butt-shuffl ing into history but demand-ing praise and kind treatment for deeds un-done, for lessons unlearned./uni00A0 But studying war once more. . . .”
Pages 479-481 with Reverend Hickman’s
evocation as an old man of life in Oklahoma as a young man are terri/f_i cally moving and powerful, too—as are so many passages in /T_h ree Days.
John Callahan and Adam Bradley will be at
LC to discuss /T_h ree Days Before the Shooting
on Wednesday, Feb. 17 in the Agnes Flanagan Chapel at 7:30 p.m. Reading and book sign-ing. Free.Visible Man: Prof. Callahan releases
Ellison’s un/f_i nished second novel
As Ralph Ellison’s literary executor, Morgan S. Odell Professor of the Humanities John Calla-
han has been working with former student Adam Bradley to compile the author’s manuscripts for 15 years. Now, Thirteen Days Before the Shooting: The Unfi nished Second Novel of Ralph Ellison is here. Callahan let the Pioneer Log in on what came after Invisible Man .
ILLUSTRATION BY KATHRYN MILLER
Spring sports officially start -
ed this weekend when the Pio -
neer softball team played its first
home games against Corban in
a doubleheader. The Pios were
defeated 10-1 in the first game
and 6-1 in the second. The team,
however, showed improvement
in the second game, especially
defensively. At the moment
the softball team is taking these
games as learning experiences.
Feldt, the new softball coach
at LC, is coming to the program
with a realistic view of the up -
coming season, and plenty of ex -
perience to back her up. When
she was a student at Oregon
State she played on the team,
and then coached high school
softball. From there she coached
at OSU for five years, and now
finds herself coaching the Pios.
She started with the team this
fall and immediately fell into a
comfortable standing with her
athletes.
“They can feel and hear my
passion,” Feldt said, referring to
discussions she’s had with her
team, “and I can see their passion
in their eyes.” Although the level
of play from OSU to LC differs,
Feldt has had an easy transition.
Right now, Feldt’s main goal is to learn.
She hopes to inspire the team learn from fail -
ures and discover how to be a better team
and overall a better group of athletes. An -
other main goal for the softball team will
be to change its mental approach. As Feldt
said, “We’ll keep working hard, and the wins
should take care of themselves.” Since it is a
transition year, the team will need to become
cohesive in their competition, then consistent
wins should follow.
The team is already getting off to a good
start, as it left their fall season with confidence.
At the last practice for the softball team and the men’s baseball team the two teams scrim -
maged in a softball game. In the end, the men
defeated the women 1-0. For the entirety of
the game the women held their own, playing
consistent defense that held the teams at 0-0
up until the end of the game, when the men
managed their only home run. Spectators and
opponents alike commented on the team’s
confidence and overall game performance.
The softball team has been training hard
all season, alternating weeks with the baseball
team for either 6:30 a.m. practices or 7:30
p.m. slots on the field. The team’s next com -
petition is the Concordia Tournament Feb.
20-21 where it will play Northwest Christian,
Oregon Tech and Concordia. Volume 73, Number 1 Sports 10 the Pioneer Log, February 12, 2010
Softball team starts spring
season with confidence
by Lindsey Bosse
Jessica Mullins (‘10) steps up to bat against
Corban last weekend at the LC diamond.PHOTO BY SAM MARGEVICIUS
Pioneer swimmers head to
conference this weekend
by Lindsey Bosse
The entire swim season has led up to the
Northwest Conference meet in Federal Way,
Wash. this weekend. Head Coach Chris Fantz
says he expects “very fast swimming” from his
athletes. According to the NWC, they too ex -
pect fast times from all the swimmers in the
conference this year, being as 2009 marked the
fastest championship meet in NWC history.
The team has trained extremely hard both
in and out of the water this entire season. The
competitions leading up to this meet have also
been successful for the entire team. Going into
conference, the coaches and a few swimmers
hope for some national-qualifying races.
While the whole team goes to conference,
there are a few athletes on both the men’s and
women’s teams that are already seeded first.
Rachael Cazden (’13) is seeded first in the
50-meter freestyle, 100-meter freestyle and the
100-meter backstroke. Cat Menkel-Lawrence
(’11) is favored in the 200-meter backstroke
and individual medley, and Claire Jordan (’11)
holds rank in the distance freestyle. On the
men’s side, Zach Hixson (’10) is seeded for the
backstroke and Issac Ekblad (’13) in the sprint
freestyle. Josh Spegman (’13) will be attempt -
ing a new race, the 200-meter backstroke this
weekend with a good shot at placing.
All the swimmers have had great seasons,
and while individual events are the keynote
of swim competition, the Pioneers have been
very successful as a team. This was proved at
the last home meet when the women came to -gether to overtake Linfield in the last race of
the meet.
Coach Fantz and captain Kira McGieson
(’12) both say that this team is extremely co -
hesive this year.
“It’s nice to come to practice with 30 of
your friends, not just 30 people you go back
and forth with in the pool,” said McGieson.
Beyond the training at school, the team
spent a week in California during the winter
break training as well.
“It’s a great week for training and team
bonding,” said Fantz.
Overall the team has taken the time and
effort not only to become better athletes, but
also to become a closer team. For training it’s
“all about intensity and quality of effort, first
and foremost,” Fantz said.
In the past couple of weeks leading up to
this weekend’s three-day competition, train -
ing has tapered off slightly, providing plenty
of rest for the swimmers. Last year McGieson
calculated how much time the team cut from
their races overall, which summed up around
ten minutes. She plans on doing the same this
year, and getting a better result.
This year’s first-years have been a great ad -
dition to the team, making numerous podium
appearances. The men’s squad is the largest it
has been in recent history. After this season,
the team will loose three men and no women.
The meet will be held at the King County
Aquatic Center with prelims at 10 a.m. on Fri -
day, finals at 6 p.m. on Friday and Saturday,
and again at 5 p.m. on Sunday.
ADVERTISEMENTAfter leading by 3 points at the half, the
Lewis & Clark men’s basketball team fell
80-73 to Willamette T uesday night, bring -
ing their record to 8-13 overall and 7-6 in
the Northwest Conference. The Pioneers
dropped to fourth in the NWC after being
tied last week at third with three games left
in the regular season.
Led by Josh Kollasch (’10), who picked
up a double-double on the night, 28 points
and 10 boards, the Pio’s held strong in
the first half. The team shot over 50 per -
cent from the field and free throw line in
the first half, and managed to keep the lead
with big shots from James Hollins (’12),
Kyle Meeuwsen (’11) and Kollasch.
A deep three from Hollins gave the Pios
their biggest half lead, six points, with a lit -
tle over four minutes left in the half. The
lead was diminished after a steal by Willa -
mette with only seconds on the clock, and
the teams hit the locker rooms with a score
of 40-37.
The Pios failed to keep pace with the
Bearcats in the second half and were out -
scored by 10. Tied with less than 10 min -
utes in the game, the Pios let their lead slip
as missed shots and turnovers plagued the
team. However, the Pios played solid de -
fense, not allowing Willamette to go on any
game-ending runs.
Down by 5 with only 45 seconds on the
clock, the Pios were unable to come up with
the shots and steals they needed. At the
buzzer, Willamette took the win, 80-73.
On Saturday, Feb. 6, the Pios dominat -
ed Pacific Lutheran, 72-46. PJ Taylor (’12)
led the team with 19 points, followed by
Hollins with 17 points, and Kollasch with
14. Hollins also added 13 rebounds to the
night and leads the team in boards averag -
ing nearly 8 per game. Hollins is an up-
and-coming force on the team, averaging
16 points per night.
The Pios have one more home game
before they finish out their season on the
road. LC will square up against Pacific this
Saturday before taking on no. 3 ranked
George Fox Friday, Feb. 19. Sign up at Sat -
urday’s game or visit the main athletics of -
fice in Pamplin Sports Complex to ride the
Rooter Bus, sponsored by Student-Athlete
Advisory Committee.LC men’s basketball falls
to Willamette, 80-73
by Nichole Carnell
ILLUSTRATION BY TOM MEATH11 Sports the Pioneer Log, February 12, 2010
by Michael G. Richman
The Lewis & Clark men’s tennis team
opened up its season last Saturday at home
against Division I Seattle University. LC lost
9-0 and failed to win a single set, yet the ear -
ly season match-up against such a quality op -
ponent will be useful experience for the team
moving forward.
“I’m always looking for a challenge, usu -
ally the harder the challenge the more you
can learn from it,” said Peter Ray (’10).
“When you go out and play a really good
school you kind of can really learn what you
can improve on your game.
“Playing a Division I school is much dif -
ferent than the normal matches we’re play -
ing,” Ray said. “They’re going to bring it to
you, they’re not going to give anything up.”
In its first match the team played four
first-year players, Cole Pfeiffer (’13), Wataru
Nakamura (’13), Junya Furakawa (’13) and
Kerry White (’13).
“This year we only have two seniors and
very few returning people so we’re going to
look onto them to really step up and you
know get up to pace,” Ray said.
George Allen (’11), the team’s no. 1 play -
er who is returning from a year abroad, is
thrilled to have a strong group of first-year
players join the ranks.“This is probably the best
team we’ve had since I’ve been
here,” Allen said, “and probably
the most focused.”
While the top players like
Allen, Ray and Furakawa are
well established in their posi -
tions, both Allen and Ray agree
that there could be major fluc -
tuation and competition for the
bottom three singles seeds.
White and Quinn Roth
Carter (’12), who both played
as the no. three doubles pairing
but did not get into any singles
matches, will have ample op -
portunity to crack the top six as
the season progresses.
The team’s depth will be an
asset as it looks to compete in
theNorthwest Conference and
end a four-year long postseason
drought.
After three consecutive sev -
enth place finishes, the Pioneers
are looking to grab a spot in
the top six and earn a trip to
conference playoffs. Just a few
shots separated the team from
postseason play and an early
end to the season. Their conference
season starts at home against George
Fox tonight and then take on Pacific
Saturday, Feb 13.
In recent years the battle for the fi -
nal spot in the conference playoffs has
come down to George Fox, Pacific,
Puget Sound and LC.
So although it is early in the sea -
son, this weekend should prove to be
a measuring stick as to where the Pios
can expect to finish in the conference
and what it will take to make it to the
postseason.
Losses by no means eliminate them
from contention, but wins early in
the season will boost the team’s confi -
dence. It will also help them down the
stretch as they try to secure a spot in
the postseason tournament.
Allen, who says he has taken on a
new leadership role this season, is con -
fident the team can reach the confer -
ence tournament and feels the rest of
the team shares his confident swagger.
“That’s the coaches’ attitude and
that’s how people feel on the team,”
said Allen.
Play begins at 3:30 p.m. today and
1 p.m. tomorrow in the T ennis Dome.Furakawa (’13) and Allen (’11) “pound” each other
during their showdown against Seattle University.Men’s tennis falls to Seattle, gears up for conference
PHOTO BY SAM MARGEVICIUS
The women’s basketball team was
picked to finish fifth in the confer -
ence. They lacked senior leadership,
they had freshmen that were going to
play big minutes—in short they had a
lot of question marks.
Now 9-4 in conference (15-7
overall), locked in at third place in the
NWC and eyeing a spot in the con -
ference playoffs, this team seems to
have all the answers.
After their first frustrating stretch
of the season, in which the team lost
four straight games, the Pioneers re -
sponded with a three-game winning
streak including a gutsy last-second
win on the road against Linfield, fol -
lowed by a 64-58 home win over Pa -
cific Lutheran the follwing night.
The Pios beat Willamette 70-58
on T uesday night, exploiting their size
advantage and dominating the glass
on both ends en route to a comfort -
able home victory.
Neva Hauser (’12) led the team
with 17 points and 7 rebounds,
while Megan Spence (’12) chipped
in with 12 and 10 of her own, her
third double-double of the season. Christina Herring (’11) finished a
rebound shy of a her own double-dou -
ble, with 11 points and 9 rebounds in
the win.
LC finished with a stunning 29 of -
fensive rebounds that helped offset the
fact that they were outshot by Wil -
liamette 34 percent to 31 percent.
Kristina Williams (’13) was the
only other Pio to reach double digits
as she had 10 points and 8 rebounds.
The women have three games re -
maining in their season and need a win
to essentially lock up a spot in the con -
ference tournament.
LC finishes up the season on the
road against George Fox and Puget
Sound, the top two teams in the con -
ference.
The Pios lost to both teams the first
times they played them this year.
Before the tough road trip, the team
plays its final home game of the season
against Pacific Feb. 13 on 8 p.m. in
Pamplin Sports Complex.
The team will honor seniors Talera
Rich and Paige Dinnie in their final
home game as Pioneers.
Additionally, this game is part of
the “Think Pink” promotion to raise
money for breast cancer research.
Christina Herring (’11) rises up for a jumper in
the home win over Williamette Tuesday night.Lady Pio hoops fight for third in NWC
by Michael G. RichmanWomen’s Tennis
Feb. 13..............at Pacific
(Ore
PHOTO BY MAGGIE OLIVERMen’s Tennis
2/12...George Fox @ 3:30 p.m.
2/13...Pacific (Ore.) @ 1 p.m.
Men’s Basketball
2/13...Pacific (Ore.) @ 6 p.m.
Senior Night
Women’s Basketball
2/13...Pacific (Ore.) @ 8 p.m.
Senior NIght
“Think Pink”
Upcoming
Pioneer
Home Sports
ADVERTISEMENTBackdoor 12
You Caught My Eye
Please e-mail your“You Caught My Eye” to piolog@lclark.eduILLUSTRATION BY BRAD JONASthe Pioneer Log, February 12, 2010
The Backdoor is a work of humor and does not actually contain real news.
Some members of the Backdoor staff are still without dates...accepting applications now. Inside the Issue...
[pg. 10] Teen magi-
cian without a date for Valentine’s Day. Mother still thinks he’s amazing. [pg. 3] Woman marries
a giant baby. Community unsure if this is a curious case or just weird.[pg. 4] Construction halted
after crew realized blueprints were wrong. “Whoops,” says foreman.You: Drawing major on top.Me: Sculpture major waiting for you to come in my basement.
Mad Sonnet Lib
/T_h e Heart Attack
1/2 can of Red Bull1 shot tequila1 shot spiced rum1 shot lime vodka
I’m dedicating this drink to all
the people out there that are without an other this Sunday. Nothing spells “forget” like alcohol and caff eine. Keep a de/f_i brillator handy. And maybe a bucket. Your call.Drink for
V-DayFact for
V-Day
Q: What did the caveman give his wife on Valentine’s Day?
A1 (for kids): Ughs and kisses!
A2 (for reals): A rack of triceratops
ribs before knocking her in the head with a club and dragging her back to his cave.
How times have
changed.Cut-Out Valentines!Shall I compare thee to (M. Night Shyamalan movie) ?
/T_h ou art more lovely and more (synonym for “awesome”) :
(NFL team) do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer’s lease hath all too short a date:
Sometime too hot the (meal at the Bon) shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm’d;
And every fair from fair sometime (Olympic event, verb) ,
By (Rat Pack member) or (Brat Pack Member) ’s changing course
untrimm’d;
But thy eternal (T ransformer) shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou owest;
Nor shall Death brag thou (euphemism) in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou (verb, Early Modern English’d) :
So long as men can (thing you did drunk last week) or eyes can see,
So long lives this and this gives (favorite beer from a can) to thee.
You’re like a star,
Valentine! With that
said, really sorry
about giving you
crabs. My bad.Can you feel the love tonight,
in the circle...the circle of life?
My gift is my song and, this
one is crocodile rock. Hold me
closer Bennie and the Jets!
...Elton John will get me laid,
right?
Dear Mr./Miss,
I fi nd you attractive and wish to perform
intercourse with you. It would be a delight if you concurred. Please respond in writing.My love for you is
like this heart:
Oblong, poorly
made and a little
fl at.
Let’s bang.
Brad Elkins loves
you this muchMy love, you’re like a heroin needle. Come on over and inject me, I’m cooking something up.
Valentine’s Day Soundtrack
1. “Breaking up is Hard to Do”
by /T_h e Carpenters. Nothing spells romance like reit-erating how diffi cult the alterna-tive is.
2. “Bad Romance” -Lady Gaga
It is important to make it as clear as possible how much crap you are willing to put up with in a re-lationship right away. Use this to break the ice.
3. “Loveable” -Kim Jong Kook
YouT ube this. NOW.
4. “You Remind Me of My Jeep”
-R.KellyEvery women loves a good meta-phor, especially those that involve comparing your sex life to your automobile. Sexy smooth.5. Anything by Tom JonesIf you want to get with that mom-ma you’ve seen pushing her stroll-er up and down the block, play a bit of blue-eyed soul. Wiki it.
6. “Rocket Man” -Elton John
T rust me, she’ll love it.
7. “I’m in Love with a Stripper”
-T-PainLet T-Pain say the words that you couldn’t /f_i nd the strength to say. Valentines Day and strippers, the perfect combination!
Sup,
you’ll do.Hi,
you’re cute.
Hello there,
Brace yourself.Hey,
you+me=YES.